Challenging Perfection
My mind thinks it gets to control what's perfect. And it usually does. But not today, mind. Not today.
In my last post, I shared that I was going to post a story about the bad assery of my grandmother. I still plan to but there is so much to learn before I put that piece together. Until then, please enjoy the imperfection my mind doesn’t want me to post.
I want to publish more frequently. I want to post stories, interview people. I want to learn and share stories. Stories from the mundane to the extraordinary. Nothing is too big nor too small. No person is too important or not important enough, whatever that means.
If you happen to come across this piece and are open to being interviewed about your path, please reach out. I’d love to chat!
I want to normalize the human struggle and triumph. The ways in which we find our next step. Our guiding light, that voice, God, intuition, whatever you want to call it. And how we fight against our own internal conflict and limiting beliefs. Our demons or our mind. Maybe even others. People who don’t see what we see or how we see it. They don’t believe it in it the way we do. I don’t blame them. They’re only able to see and dream as big as their own self-limiting beliefs. Sometimes we take their beliefs on as our own.
We must not.
I want to share stories about how we break beyond all of these things. How we learn to trust ourselves, listen to ourselves, and take action for ourselves. Over and over until we get to where we want to be. It’s not likely to look how we envisioned. It’s not likely to feel that way either but if we enjoy the process, then what more could we ask for?
Writing brings me joy. It helps me understand what I’m feeling. Vomit out whatever emotions might be inside. Writing makes me feel lighter. I enjoy the process of crafting a story. Adding tension, playing with different dialogue, and thinking about the latent and manifest content.
Yet, I find my mind, my much-too-active-mind, overthink everything. It doesn’t allow me to publish anything if it’s not “perfect”. Whatever that means. It makes up these stories that millions of people will read that piece that’s not perfect and then I’ll look dumb. And let’s be honest, I have tens of subscribers. I’d be ecstatic if I got 100 views on any given post.
Today, I’m deciding to challenge my mind. This piece has barely been edited. (I had to fix the typos.) It’s a stream of consciousness writing and I’m sharing it in its raw form, imperfect. That part of me that wants to feel amazing about every word I’ve written needs to be challenged.
So here I am. Challenging it. It’s scary. But fuck it.
I hope I see you next week with another imperfect piece.
Stay Tuned
Thank you for taking the time to read this post. Your attention could have been on any number of other things but you chose to spend time with my imperfect words. Subscribe or follow to follow along this journey.
Currently
Reading: Short Stories by Lydia Davis. My favorite so far has been “Enlightened”. Give it a read. It’s only a paragraph.
Listening to: The Diary of a CEO with Steven Bartlett where he talks to Master Shi Hong Yi about ancient mind tricks Shaolin monks use to master themselves and break free.
Thinking about: The people of Palestine.
Posts I Recently Read and Loved
Aligning Your Sour Current With the Currents Around You by
This is because, in flow, intuition works at its highest capacity, telling you what to think and what to do, working simply by an inner knowing.
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You are to be fireproof, but never fiery.
You are to be powerful, but never loud.
Wanted, but never wanting.
Beautiful, but never dangerous.
You are to be angry, but only in private. With the door closed. In a language no one else understands.And yet—inside you is a howl.
Not a whisper, a howl.
A scream born of centuries. -
Wondering is intelligence the collection of information
Or using tools that point at the price of peace, like
What is sustainability?
How we construct in the order of destruction
Building a sense to know the difference of what to do
and what needs to be done now
Navigating Life Beyond The Rat Race by
You may desire to reach your goals fast, but if you are not healthy enough to enjoy what follows then it’s probably not worth it.
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Those who have stopped short at only what the five senses can perceive—or worse, what can only be seen with the eyes—will never venture this far.